Happy Groundhog Day! Do you love the 1993 Bill Murray movie, like I do? A classic tale of a loudmouth jerk who changes his ways, with the magic of time and do-overs. If mad little Monkeys ever make you lose your cool and act like a jerk (like me) the Stop Watch tool is for you.
Follow along in the ‘Live from the Loo’ video above, featuring my alter-ego Queen Poopicina reading the potty-mouth ‘Holy Sh*t’ version of the tool, and a spontaneous semi-weird song. OR jump down to read the steps below.
Sometimes a Brave Voice sounds like a pissed-off voice.
Last week, I bombasted my sweetheart for over-giving his time and energy. To his best friend, who is dying.
Yikes! Surprise Monkey attack 🙊 If only I’d remembered the Pause. I could have been a supportive spouse instead of a screaming meanie.
To be fair, I spent decades stifling my true feelings (“because conflict sucks, and it’s best to hold everything in,” say the Monkeys of Trauma). These days, I sometimes allow my brave voice to go too far in the other direction, sharing my truth way-too-muchly. Is that ever you, too?
The Pause is a magical, expansive moment to take a breath and shift perspective. Which can melt that Monkey business before the damage is done.
The Stop Watch Tool: How can I see things differently?
BREATHE deeply, get comfortable.
RECALL a situation when you felt very frustrated, annoyed or angry at someone.
IMAGINE holding a Stop Watch in your hand. Notice its weight, material, size, color. Click the button to magically stop time, and pause.
STOP and WATCH what was really happening. Notice what you’re doing, thinking, feeling.
SHIFT your perspective to a higher viewpoint, so you can see the bigger picture. NOTICE how the other(s) may be thinking and feeling. Does this affect your attitude or actions?
REFLECT: In the pause, I noticed...
Make it Real: Practice the pause
EXPLORE: Tell or write what you observed in the pause. Act on any new insights (e.g. apologies?)
CREATE: Sketch a simple diagram of the situation from a bird’s eye view, noting the players’ perspectives.
MANIFEST: This week, use the Stop Watch to pause a difficult situation, so you can shift to a higher perspective. Notice if this affects how you react.
🎤 Let me know…
What really pisses you off? How do you express it?
Any big regrets about losing your cool, like I do? Would pausing help?
Could a Pause improve a personal, political, or planetary shit-uation?
Thank you for practicing the Sacred Pause. If this is encouraging, please like, share, and subscribe for more stories, semi-weird songs, and short practices to support your brave creative voice. More to come!
Joy of the Week: making new friends, taking a cold swim in the Salish Sea
More to come,
As a multi-passionate elder, I’ve faced the Monkeys of Fear in many creative corners. 🙉🙊🙈My work has appeared in Time Magazine, feature films and television, newspapers, and YA fantasy novels; I wrestled with a fear of singing to perform on stages and festivals on the West Coast. Today’s 5-min. practice is from HeartsQuest and Holy Sh*T! creative healing decks, used by therapists, oracle lovers, and People who Poo. 💩 More at HeartsQuest.com. 💗
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