Does Sugar = Love?

Befriending the comforts and joys of a complicated emotional support substance

Dear Brave Soul, do you love to bake sweets to share with family and friends? I hate to admit this, but I’ve judged you and your unhealthy sugary traditions… until now.

Gramma’s famous rolled sugar cookies with cream cheese frosting & colored sugar. We sent this special batch to her son in Indiana, who couldn’t visit because his leukemia came back after 6 years. His daughter just donated her stem cells for his treatment.

Gramma loves sweet desserts almost as much as she loves God.

Gramma moved into assisted living. We honor her transition with sugar.

Gramma and her husband used to bake for weeks to prep for our summer visits. Sugar is her love language. I’ve always enjoyed her cookies, but after eating a few — or twelve — my body feels yucky and sluggish (which makes me crave more cookies).

I used to dread what I called ‘sugar holidays’ at her house. Now she’s a widow recovering from a hip replacement, living in an elder community. This visit is about soothing and supporting her. My heart whispers, “Bake her famous cookies.” The last thing I wanna do is get all frown-y and judge-y about this.

2024: Gramma’s card table stuffed with cookies and bars, placed right in our path

Sugar means comfort and joy

When I was a kid running to my own Gramma’s house, she gave us a hug, smoochy kisses, then brought out some treats. Strawberries dipped in sugar were a carrier for good feelings: “Welcome home, honey, to simple sensory pleasures.” Baking expresses a nurturing heart and feminine creativity.

We didn’t know about the high cost of sugar

Sugar seems so fun, so innocent. We didn’t know how sugar led to the slave trade. How our rampant sugar consumption affects public health, creates inflammation, leads to obesity and diabetes, and causes environmental destruction.¹

Cookies are a must for Gramma’s potluck to say goodbye to friends and family.

A beloved neighbor Mom and her kids got in on the sugary joy

These days we avoid processed foods or drinks made with sugar or corn syrup.² I don’t enjoy baking, but usually say “yes, please” to friend’s or family’s homemade desserts. I want to honor the care and love that’s bundled in each bite. How can I balance this with my concerns over our infatuation with sugar?

At a recent wedding, the couple created this ‘Love is Sweet’ gift table:

Wedding guests could fill a bag with treats, a great love of the happy couple

Sugar as emotional support

When the day gets hard or overwhelming, or the world feels too much, you can find me in the kitchen, hunting for sweets. It’s a clear sign. My emotions need tending.

I’m not gonna judge myself for grabbing a dark chocolate or a handful of granola. While I’m munching, I can listen to the deeper source of my yearning. I can take a moment to ask my heart, what’s going on? What do I really need right now? Facing the truth may be crunchy — yet sweeter — than a temporary fix.

I wish the same for you: to feel your emotions. And honor the love behind the treats.

🗣️ How do you feel about sugar? Is it part of your love language?

Thank you for being You. 💗 If this resonates, like this post, or share it with someone who could use a soulful moment. 💬 I adore your comments! More to come,

Nourished or inspired? Your one-time gift lights me up ✨💖✨ Thank you, dear one.

1. “The true cost of sugar,” Living Planet podcast, 06/20/2024

2. “Does sugar cause inflammation in the body?” Medical News Today, 2019